8.24.08
Just got in from having lunch with my friend, Floyd. Soon as I sat down it poured raining. And there I was in shorts and a thin white tee. Giving you nipples for days. Good Lord!!
Lunch was great. Love Floyd and good to see him. We got to talking about our mutual friend, TJ who passed last week. We had both just seen him two weeks ago. So strange. He had a massive heart attack. It's so funny the way life goes. Here me and my African American Gay Male friends survived the AIDS Crisis and we buried so many of our friends. And here in 2008 we're succumbing to things that we thought only older men had. Things like Heart Disease, Diabetes, Strokes and Hypertension are killing us. Wow. I think about that every time I pop my Beta Blocker or put those drops in my eyes for Glaucoma.
I'll miss TJ. Hope he's sleeping peacefully.
So, the key is to try and take care of yourself, tell your friends you love them and to live your life like tomorrow will never come. Guess what? Tomorrow may never come.
I'm all packed and ready to get out of here. I'm so excited. A bit nervous, but I'll be fine. I won't have my computer so I'll have to catch you up when I get back. Wish me luck. Sydney, Australia here I come.
I'm going to make Jambalaya for dinner.
I'm listening to:
_____
8.18.08
Just got home.
Took today off and went to my Physical Therapist (they told me to take it easy and I don't have to come back), went and worked out (great workout, the gym was empty), got caught in a downpour so I had to come home and change, went and had my teeth cleaned (took all of 40 minutes. no blood, no pain, no nothing), took myself to lunch (Vietnamese. Yummy) and went to get a check up from my Doctor (clean bill of health).
Busy day.
Work tomorrow.
Busy weekend.
I cleaned. I even dusted and did laundry.
Everything is done. I can start packing.
Can't believe that the time is here. I'm taking nothing but jeans with me to Sydney, so that's easy. Jeans, long sleeved t-shirts, hoodies, one pair of boots, some silicone cockrings, a few leather wristbands, a pair of leather jeans, some undies, some light sweaters and sweatshirts (it's still Winter there). That should cover it.
Can't wait.
I watched the cutest movie over the weekend:
They don't make 'em like this anymore. Shame.
______
8.15.06
I'm home. It's Friday night.
Lord, I got so much to do.
I ordered Australian Currency today. Got that out of the way.
I worked like a dog. I always do.
On August 2, 2008 I picked up:
Earlier this week I went to hear the Author answer questions and talk about the Twilight Series. They're wonderful novels. I sat with Co-Workers among 2,000 screaming Tweens. They love this series about a girl very much like them, in love with both a Vampire and a Werewolf (I'm all about Jacob). Honestly, I fell in love with the series too. I got my copy of the above signed by the Author, but I haven't cracked it. I'm saving it for the plane ride to Sydney.
Speaking of Sydney, y'all I got to get started. It's really happening. I need to get a pedicure, clean, take care of my cat; Queen, cancel the daily paper, do laundry, cancel the mail, polish boots, do finances, get a haircut, check the flight, work out, get trial size lotions (can't be ashy), get my teeth cleaned, make sure I got my High Blood Pressure pills, Glaucoma drops, clean out the frig and pack. I'm sure I missed something. I got shit to do.
I'm home. Good to be here.
I'm sipping on a beer and l put my ipod on shuffle.
Let's see...what else has been happening? Hmmmm
Not much. Just a lot of work.
A lot of peace.
And a lot of "I'm cool, y'all."
________
8.6.08
Home and cooking dinner.
Meetings most of the day, expenses and looking over contracts. That makes for a busy day.
I happened to watch:
the other day and I loved it.
Honestly, I love the Director and Editor and Cinematographer; David Hempling.
He could direct a Roach Rodeo and I'd love it. We go way back he and I.
Outstanding performances by:
Geoffrey Paine
And I'm sorry, but Billy Berlin stole the show.
OMG!!!
Billy Berlin is amazing!!! I was like, "Ooooooh Child!". Watch the DVD and you'll know what I mean.
Billy reminds me of a friend of mine. (giggling)
And I got my eye on
Mason Garet. Outstanding. Mason is soooo nasty and verbal. Love that. And Mason gives you nipples for days!
Hmmm, Mason or Billy? That's a tough one. They're both hot.
Let me get back with you on that one.
(giggling)
_________________
8.5.08
I've been swamped.
I'll recap:
Went to Vegas for work for 3 days. I worked like a dog in that heat.
Got home and had 2 after work dinner parties during the week, that got me in my bed past 11pm. Mind you, I get up everyday at 4:30am.
I did tons of laundry. I didn't even feel like unpacking until Saturday. It just sat there.
Went to the Doc for a pain in my left leg, turned out to be a torn Hamstring. Hurt like Hell. Got pills for that and 5 visits to the Physical Therapist. Great.
Work. Work.
Watched Batman: The Dark Knight. Loved it.
Ran into an ex of mine who I haven't seen since the early. We used to rock each other's world.
Work. Work.
Bills are all paid.
Not long and I'll be flying to Sydney, Australia. The time is flying!
Been working out, tenderly. Only focusing on Upper Body because of my Hamstring.
Haven't really had time to call anyone back or answer emails. It's work and get in the bed.
Got a zit the size of Mt. Fuji on my forehead that I have to take care of.
And that's pretty much what's been going on.
Went to work today and got another cocktail social handed to me in October. Lord, here's hoping I don't have to get on a plane.
And it's in Vegas.
It seems like I'm going to be living there this Fall.
_________________
7.20.08
Beautiful day.
I got up and talked to two of my sisters for hours.
I read the Sunday Paper and got the supplements I wanted out and headed to the park where all the children cruise and lay out half naked.
The park is such a trip. Everyone is in their Speedos just laying around with semis and good friends chatting. It was fun. No cruising for me. I went to get some sun and to finish one novel and start another.
One question? Why is it the children you want to see naked, never are? And the ones who should be in a wool shroud, ain't?
Good Lord!
I'm now reading:
Gay Vampires? Jesus Christ? Sex and rape? I'm all over it.
I think I'm ready for Vegas. Gonna go to work tomorrow and get my paperwork together and make a list of all the restaurants I want to check out. I'll give the place a heads up and let them know I'm coming. Sometimes I like to surprise them and then read them if the service is horrible. Oh, and tell them how many people I was planning on bringing back. But, they missed out. Oh well.
But, sometimes I like to let them know, so I can get the Red Carpet Treatment.
Please, please kiss my ass and make me comfortable. I love that.
Sometimes I hate my job. But, sometimes it has it's perks.
I did my shopping with my supplements and coupons and now I'm home.
Yes, I said coupons.
______
7.19.08
I'm listening to:
There will never be another. Barry is The Man.
Just chilling. I'm doing laundry and doing some cleaning. I'm off to Vegas soon. Got to check out all the fabulous restaurants that town has to offer. I think 3 days ought to do it. It's all for work. It'll be cool.
Last night I watched the sweetest movie. It was so cute:
Today, I called this boy I used see. Paul.
He text'd me last week and told me that his brother passed. He asked for my prayers. Silly boy. You've always had my prayers.
His brother passed, so I called today to see how he was doing. He's doing well.
We chatted and caught up on the people we have in common. He took me back to a time when I was this "Big Leather Top" who took care of things, cooked great food, made sure we had what we needed, demanded things and took care of him.
He needed me. And I needed him to need me.
When we met, I was exploring myself and going through some things. He was Paul and going through some shit too. We were kicking it and one day, I made him get tested. He hadn't in a while.
He found out he was Poz.
Get tested y'all.
Anyways, we worked through it. He dealt. We dealt.
He's grown alot since then and I'm so proud of him.
Paul, keep your head up. Shoulders back. Face forward. You're going to be just fine.
You're stronger than you think.
Look in the mirror.
Boy, there is more to you than what your eyes can see. Open your eyes.
And if you ever need anything, you know I'll always be there.
You've had to have "gone there" with a person to be able to say that.
______
7.13.08
Beautiful day.
Went and ran some errands and ran into my friends Bill and Stuart having lunch. I took myself to lunch also. had some Vietnamese soup. It rocked.
Got home and sat down and watched porn all afternoon. I was getting behind.
Out of all the DVDs I watched today, I have to say that this is my favorite.
I loved it.
Loved the whole feel of the the DVD. The wonderful folks over at Raging Stallion Studios now has a European line called High Octane and if Masters & Servants is any indication of what's to come out of that line, I got my Passport ready.
The DVD is lush, beautiful and the men are hot. The Behind The Scenes in the DVD Extras is great too. I loved the location, loved the outfits, loved the chairs, loved every scene and I loved that Masters & Servants is different than alot of the other DVDs out there. Could it have something to do with Europe? Could it be that the men don't look like men here in America? Don't know. Ain't trying to figure it out neither. All I know is I thoroughly enjoyed the whole film.
I didn't hit my Fast Foward Button once. Not once.
I personally fell in love with
Steve Hunt. He has such an innocent face. Don't let that fool ya.
Rogerio Mateo. WOOF! WOOF!!
This DVD even gave me my Husband Of The Month:
Gamal Simon. HOT! And the scene with him and
Rod Stevans in the back of that car is something to see. Gamal gets these looks on his face (mmmmm. Lord have mercy) and his body is perfection.
Buy it. Rent it. Borrow it from a friend. See Masters & Servants.
I got to put dinner on and get ready for tomorrow.
Don't really mind going to work tomorrow. I've had a good weekend.
__________
7.11.08
First of all, I'm listening to:
Don't you love Oleta Adams? If you don't you should. Her voice is beautiful. And she can sing anything. You have to sit still and listen to her. You just gotta. Love her. And I love this CD.
Got home for work. Lord, I work like a dog. Geesh.
Got home and had dinner.
I'm beat.
But, I did call my ex, Tony. Sweet man.
Alpha boy, ya know.
Tony told me the most amazing thing. We got to talking about Gay Marriage and how that in California (he lives there) you can legally get married. We used to date years ago and Tony and I have had some good times together. So, I ask him what life would be, for the both of us, if we got married. He told me marriage is a serious thing. That if "we" were to have gone there that everything would be different. That Marriage to him is a partnership. A monogamous thing that demands two.
He told me that it's work and commitment. He said that if you stand in front of witnesses and under God that you have to mean it. If not leave it alone.
I was shocked because I thought I knew Tony.
We kicked it. After dating we went to Porn Premieres. We sex clubbed together. We walked Polk Street in San Fran drunk on our asses. We laughed. We held each other. We got pissed with each other.
We 3-somed.
We did LA and San Fran and Chicago and Walnut Creek. After we stopped dating and remained friends, we fell in love with each other. As friends. Sisters. Sex with Tony is pure incest.
I tell him everything.
I love him.
But, today he showed me a side I never knew about.
When did he get it?
What is he saying about me?
Who knew?
He told me, "When you get older your priorities change. No fucking around. If "we" were to marry, I'd take my vows very seriously. Monogamy. And I'm a at home boy. "
I've never heard that from him.
I never knew.
Remind me to tell you how we met in 1997. It's the most interesting story.
__________
7.9.08
I'm sorry I haven't written in awhile. I've been crazy busy.
I went to Portland, Oregon last weekend and spent the 4th with an old friend of mine. We've known each other for 20+ years. It was great to see him and great to get away and see Portland again. Portland is a great city.
We just sat around and caught up. It was very relaxing.
I got home Sunday and have been running ever since.
Work is busy and I've started "Operation Joey". I've been off my diet and only going to the gym 2 days a week. That changed on Monday. I'm back to my old routine. I have to look great for Sydney.
Went to work today and got a call telling me my new glasses were ready. Thank God.
Picked them up and went home and changed for the gym.
My gym is full of sooooo, soooo many hot and different men. I'd say it's 90% Gay. I was working out on the same machine as this hot guy. He and I always try to out do each other on the Unassisted Chin-Up bar thing. We just small talk, but there is lots of checking each other out. He's hot to me. He comes from that Beck school. You know: tall, lean, great hair, laid back with an interesting face. Chatted with my old friend Jeff St. De Lore and Mikey. Mikey is guy who one night at a leather bar, outside on the sidewalk, he just lays this kiss on me. ??? We talk about it from time to time. He's this little hunky guy with a great ass and he's always so giggly around me.
Left the gym and went to Subway (it's an after work out tradition) for a 6 inch sub. I don't even chew them. It's like I open my mouth and swallow. I love them. Perfect after work out reward.
Home now and going to bed soon.
Busy day ahead of me tomorrow.
I'm so behind on Porn. I have a stack that has come to me that I haven't had time to watch.
I'll do that this weekend and tell you about one or two of them.
__________
6.30.08
I was sitting at home minding my own business yesterday and not feeling Pride at all. Being all Scrooge and shit. This guy I fucked around with not long ago, texted me (he's adorable) and asked me to meet him. I was like, "I'm heading to Barnes and Noble to pick up the novel I ordered. I ain't thinking about no Pride. This guy, Thom, whined and I could see him pouting thru the text and asked me to meet him. I got up.
I can't resist his pout. He's an adorable boy. You should see him in a jock strap. Beautiful.
I went to Barnes and Noble and picked up the novel I started today:
Hogg by Samuel Delany. Good Lord!! Samuel Delany is this awesome Sci-Fi Writer, but he wrote this dirty, filthy, erotic, oh my God, filthy (piss, cum, shit, rape, etc) wonderful book back almost 30 years ago. It was banned in America. You know I had to have it. I started it today. It's amazing.
Anyway, I meet up with Thom and he's just as adorable as always. We hang out and I spend most of my time hugging and kissing people I ain't seen in forever. Everyone was gawking/staring at Thom and wondering if we're boyfriends. No. He's sweet. He follows me around like a lamb to his shepherd. I love that.
So, it's like 90 degrees out and I'm half naked and I ran into 7 men that I've slept with. We're talking 2 hours here. What a slut I used to be. HAHa!!
We get to the foot of the Space Needle where Pride is and there are people everywhere. I ran into my ex Russ. Sweet man. So he and I and Thom hung out all day. I was trying to let them steer me through the crowd and finally I gave up and told those boys to let me do it. Geesh! We would've never gotten anywhere.
I found us a nice spot with filtered sunshine and we talked and laughed and I hugged people and we drank water and people watched all day. My ex Russ was adorable too. He and Thom were very quiet around each other, but that's understandable. Seeing that I had them both and loved them both differently, at different times in this life of mine. But, they're both the sweetest things.
A notion hit me to head to The Eagle for beer. Common sense and maturity told me to go home and cook dinner. Glad I did. I was in bed by 9pm.
Pride was wonderful.
Nothing like old friends.
___________
6.22.08
I've had a great weekend.
I watched the most beautiful boy in the world, Michael Pitt in:
Michael is so pretty. Allll me. He sent me in Hedwig And The Angry Inch. He sent me in this fascinating film.
I also watched:
Great movie. Eric Bana is hot. He made a great Henry VIII. Henry got a bad reputation. I understand him. History needs to lay off Henry VIII.
Let's see, I shopped like I ain't trying to save money for Australia. Everything seems to be on sale these days.
Good Lord!!! I need help. I love to shop!
I'm reading:
Ok, this book came out like 4 years ago, but it's fascinating. So, you know I went out and bought every book on the subject. There's this wonderful boy in North Carolina that calls me Daddy, he teases me that I'm behind the times. Whatever. He's only 27 years old. Silly boy. But, he's a little chocolate dream. He needs a spanking. Anyways, this whole DL thing would take me pages to go into, I'll table for another time. Bottom line, Protect yourself and your partners. Protect yourself no matter what your partner tells you. Don't get me started on my band wagon.
Dinner is cooking. Tuna Casserole.
I'm listening to:
That boy in North Carolina turned me onto to this CD. I love it. He told me today, "I told you to buy it months ago. Daddy, you're soooooo three months ago."
Whatever.
A boy will do anything to be in "trouble". Old trick. I'm behind the times, but some things never change. boys will try you. If you let them.
Today, I took myself to lunch at this fabulous Vietnamese restaurant. Vietnamese is my favorite food.
Also got a call from an ex of mine yesterday. Don't know why I called his ass back. He wanted to meet for lunch today, but his passive aggressive bullshit pissed me off. Almost ruined my day. We didn't have lunch. I wasn't in the mood. Some exes you can't be friends with.
So, I was walking home with my blood pressure slightly raised. The phone rang and that sweet boi from Sydney called to say hello.
Instantly made me feel better. Love the his accent.
______________________
6.14.08
I'm listening to:
Ann Nesby's "This Is Love". Yes it is. Love her.
I stayed up too late last night with that Cowboy buddy of mine. Love him. We hung out and ended up talking shit until 4am.
I'm no spring chicken.
Love him. He's good people.
Got up this morning, slowly and did a family function.
I'm such a lucky man. I've been out since I was 19 and my family has nothing but unconditional love for me. I can be myself. Good day. We drank and danced and ate, hugged, took photos and even had a Soul Train Line.
Guess what?
I bought my ticket to Sydney, Australia.
I'm going to Australia!!!
Can't wait.
The flight is 22 hours. Gonna kill me, but I live my life.
I live my life to the fullest.
And guess what else? My ipod is acting funny. Just when I'm trying to save money for my trip that whore of an ipod is deciding to die.
There is always something.
Time to put my Glaucoma eye drops in my eyes and go to bed.
________
6.8.08
Been on the sofa all day. I love Sundays.
There's a homemade Turkey Noodle Soup in the crockpot. The Bachelor Pad is smelling good.
Chilling.
You know I got to get all my shit done before 6pm. You know I got to watch The Los Angeles Lakers playing The Boston Celtics in Boston. I'll be watching my Baby-Daddy, Kevin Garnett. All 6 foot 11, 220 lbs of him.
Chocolate. Chocolate.
_________
6.7.08
Got up this morning and did laundry. Got it out of the way.
Then I got dressed and walked downtown to do some shopping. I ended up with a new fragrance and some new undies. I love undies.
My eye appointment was at 3pm. I went 2 weeks ago and had a lot of tests done. Didn't look good. I had to go back for those tests and more.
I ordered new glasses and was diagnosed with the early stages of Glaucoma.
Great.
I left with my prescription and went to the drug store.
The Doc told me that Glaucoma is what he thought it was when I was there 2 weeks ago. During that time I had time to read up on it, tell family and friends and prepare myself.
Today was no shocker. I was ready.
Life started out tough for me medically. I can't expect no less as I age. Hey, Glaucoma ain't nothing. Not when I think about all the other shit I had to deal with thus far.
I'm pretty tough. Had to be.
I know one thing. I know that I'm bouts to see all that I can see. I want to witness the most beautiful things on this earth. I'm going to take mental photos of it all. And after trying to take care of myself and living my life--if God decides to turn the lights out, hey, I'll close my eyes and remember. And deal with it.
Know what I'm saying?
On a lighter note, I'm listening to:
Great voice. Great songs. Great lady. Great talent. Love this CD. It's remakes of some of the most wonderful Old School R&B hits ever recorded. Regina own everyone of them. Gina and I go way back
_________
6.1.08
Where is the time going? It's June already!
Last night I sat at home and had dinner and watched:
Great movie. Nicole was so fabulous.
I also watched a documentary on the Russian Composer, Pyotr Tchaikovsky (1840-1893).
Scandalous and interesting. His music is beautiful, but what a life. Gay ya know. Had to hide it ya know. I love historical films about what it was like being Gay in the old days. It wasn't pretty. I think sometimes we take for granted the rights we have today. They might not be what we want, but it's sure better than what they were yesterday.
I'm home.
Had lunch with my friend Floyd today. Love him. My Straight Cowboy called about maybe having a beer later. Would love to see him, but now, I'm frying the hell out of some chicken wings and I got some mustard greens cooking.
Don't think I'll be going anywhere, but on my sofa with a remote in my hand.
___________________________________
5.23.08
I'm home. Long day.
Since 2003, I've spent ever Memorial Day Weekend in Chicago and IML (International Mr. Leather) and I'm not there this year. I'm going to Sydney, instead.
I miss IML. (insert sad face here)
Oh, well, I know the boys are having a good time. And the Dom are running shit.
Good times, y'all.
Happy 30th IML!
I'm there with you in Leather Spirit. Thank you for so many wonderful years.
I'm listening to:
My friend, Quinten turned me on to Heather and thank God for Quinten and Heather too. Love this CD. And Heather sings, y'all. Looking like my cousin, Linda Faye.
_______
5.18.07
I got up this morning and walked to International District to do food shopping. It's quite a hike, but it only took me 30 minutes there and 30 minutes back. It's hot outside, so I took my t-shirt off to get some rays. Good exercise. Try walking back home (30 minutes) carrying 20 or so pounds of meat and shit.
It felt good.
Cleaned today.
I'm sticking to my schedule of picking up after myself and it's working. I like the place clean. To keep it that way, I have to do a little bit every day. Wish me luck. So far so good. (knocking wood)
Cooking dinner now. I'm making my dry, garlic short ribs. They rock!! And so easy. The one thing to remember with ribs is that you have to be patient and turn those boys. I like mine dry. Who wants all that sauce sticking to your fingers and dripping everywhere? Yuck!
With that, I'm having some steamed corn and some steamed spinach.
While dinner is cooking, I'm listening to:
I love Old School Country Music. I don't even know who these "Country" singing kids are today. That ain't no Country.
I love Miss Dolly Parton. I love this CD. She sings, "I'm A Little Bit Slow To Catch On", "I Wish I Felt This Way At Home", "I'll Oilwells Love You", "False Eyelashes" and "Baby Sister".
Anybody say anything bad about Miss Dolly, I get upset. She's my girl.
I think to go to Dollywood would be a kick! I know I'd have a ball.
It's on the list.
_________
5.17.08
Got up and my oldest sister called me. We talked a long time. Just catching up. I have 6 sisters. They're my best friends. We can talk on the phone for hours.
I'm listening to:
Love this CD. Love this woman. My friend Bill turned me onto to Miss Shirley Horn years go. The story goes that he was in a CD store and heard one note of a Shirley Horn CD and said that he thought of me and he had to buy it. Been listening to her every since. This CD takes me places. I love all of it. Never grow tired of it. Miss Horn is dead now, but hey, she's still my girl. If you're talking Jazz Piano and Vocals, they don't get any better than Shirley Horn.
Got out today. It was like 90 degrees. There were half naked boys everywhere. I got my hair cut and hit the liquor store. Don't know what it is, but I felt like drinking Champagne. So I picked up some. I took myself to lunch.
Got home and took a nap.
And now, I'm up and doing laundry.
I made my yummy Guacamole. I don't mess around with Guacamole. I diced all the tomato, jalapeño, onion, cilantro and I then pressed the garlic. I then forked the avocado into it all. Add a few squeezes of fresh lime and it's done. The fork is very important. It's got to be chunky.
Tortilla Chips and Guacamole is perfect for a warm evening.
I'm going to watch some TV and call it a day.
Gym tomorrow.
That's about it.
Sure hope you're out enjoying yourselves this weekend.
Be safe ok?
________________________________________
5.16.08
Let me say this. I'm listening:
I'm not really feeling Aretha these days (used to love her), but I do like this CD that came out in 2003. I love, love "You Are My Joy" and "Are You Falling Out Of Love With Me". Pure Aretha. The piano intro on "So Damn Happy" sends me. Again, pure Aretha.
I've been working my ass off.
Today was like in the uppers 80s. Can you believe that? Seattle?
I was on the trolley coming home and I saw an old, wonderful ex Porn Star on the same trolley. I loved him back in the day. In my Porn Library, I just happen to own my favorites of his work. He looks good. I looked at him and he looked at me and I heard somewhere that he has kinda put that world behind him gracefully and that he's just living in Seattle and doing his thing. Cool.
All I could think about was an interview. Wow.
But, no, I changed my gears. I reached in my tote and pulled out the novel I'm reading and started reading.
After all, I'm just like him. I'm older and I'm happy. I'm just living in Seattle and doing my thing. And sometimes, I just want to be left along to do just that.
Does that make sense?
Just woke up from a little cat nap on the sofa. I was beat.
I was sleeping and the phone rang. It was that nice boi that I'm going to spend my holiday in Sydney with. I love the accent. Can't wait to get there.
What a surprise.
I'm excited about my trip. I got butterflies too.
A little, poor, Black boy in Northwest Louisiana used to look across a railroad tack and only dream of places like San Francisco, New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Fort Lauderdale, Berlin, Baltimore and good old Palm Springs.
Blows me away.
Sydney, Australia? Me?
Blessed?
You bet. No doubt.
And I'm not done yet.
Life is short.
I say, have a good time.
And enjoy yourself.
_________
5.11.08
Happy Mother's Day!!!
Did you call your moms today? I did. We had a nice chat.
Of course she asked when I was coming home. I don't know. Sure have been thinking about it. My Grandmother is in her late 90s. If I don't get there soon, it might be too late. And that would be a bummer.
Friday night I hung out with that Straight Cowboy. Needless to say, I was hung over all day yesterday. Love him. He's so silly. All I do is laugh when I'm with him. We were drinking Mexicolas. Tequila, Lime and Coke. Holy Mexicoly!!!! I was on the sofa most of yesterday. Good times with my buddy.
Finished laundry today and headed to the gym.
Now, I'm flipping channels, cooking dinner and chilling.
________________
5.4.08
Happy Masturbation Month!
I read somewhere that May is Masturbation Month. How cool is that?
So, y'all know what to do. Love yourselves this month. Please yourself this month. I know I plan to.
Hey, it's Sunday.
I'm listening to:
I love Mozart. His choral stuff sends me. Mozart gives you Soprano. Mozart gives you Tenor.
I'm cleaning. It's a never ending chore for me. I hate it. I'm a slob.
I cleaned off the coffee table and that girl was filled with magazines. I'm a magazine junkie. I love them. I get "Men's Health", "Rolling Stone", "Men's Journal" and "Fortune". I'll get one in the mail and here comes another. So, my coffee table was stacked with magazines that I have yet to read. A friend said that if I hadn't read one before the next one comes, I have to recycle the oldest one. But, I can't. I haven't read it yet.
And therein lies the clutter that is my life.
There is just too much to read. I'll get to it all.
So, I'm cleaning.
Gonna hop in the shower (I smell) and cook dinner.
I've been off my diet. Tonight I'm having brown rice, pinto beans and salsa. I'm going to slice an avocado and call it a day. It's great protein, great rice and just a little fat from the avocado. The salsa will blend everything together.
Went to the gym yesterday and on the way home, I ran into this guy I dated 100 years ago. I was well, well into my 30s and he had to be 24-25 then. It was good too see him. Sweet child. We used to kick it! He had the best kisses in the world. I could kiss him all day. Back in the day.
Yesterday, it was just good to see him. We've run into each other before. Whenever he sees me, we catch up and he gives me the biggest hugs. He's always happy to see me. Ditto. He's a Musician and it was a trip back in the day to go out with him and have him sing with a band and shit and, dedicate a song to me. Then we'd walk back to his place, climb in his bed and share a beer. He'd turn that smooth, beautiful back of his to me and we'd talk and talk and talk and talk and talk.
I could tell y'all stories about me and that boy.
Good times.
Anyways, I just took a break from cleaning to catch y'all up on shit.
Time to get in the shower.
After that, I'm going to clean the bathroom and put that rice in the rice cooker.
There goes my Sunday.
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4.29.08
My Hay Fever is off the hook!
I can't stop sneezing. It ain't pretty. I'm going through boxes of tissue.
Tis the season. I'll be fine.
I'm listening to
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4.26.08
I haven't done jack shit all day. I love Saturdays.
I was on the sofa all day. I watched a lot of Logo. Logo is this Gay Channel on cable. There is news, movies, comedy and all kinds of shows. I put it on and just let it play. www.logoonline.com
Today the Logo Network showed one of my favorite movies:
It's such a wonderful, Romantic Comedy. Love a Gay Romantic Comedy with a musical number. This movie always makes me feel good. Awwwwwwww
Shut up.
Let's see, I'm about to get in the shower. I haven't showered all day. I love it.
After that, I'm going to drag out my Fondue Pot and have some hard salami, fresh sliced peppers and onion with a hard baguette.
This computer has been on all day. I'm dumping music into my ipod. Geesh this takes a long time. But, it'll be worth it.
Tomorrow I'll get up and take my ass to the gym. I sure hope that guy who has that great ass is there. He always tries to out do me on the unassisted chin-up bar. He's hot. Motivation is a good thing.
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4.25.08
I'm blessed to know this wonderful Welsh Gentleman. We're the same age. He has two kids and a wife. He's the complete opposite of me. I'm reviewing Porn and he's at soccer practice. We talk a lot of politics and we talk a lot of music.
He gave me the hard drive that houses all the music for his ipod. Fascinating shit.
It's on my ipod now.
This week, he bought me about 30 CDs. So, this weekend I'm going to import them all into my ipod.
I've gone European Pop crazy. The Classical Music in his collection is amazing.
I love this album:
Here was this struggling Glam English Band, Mott the Hoople. David Bowie wrote a song for them and produced their album. Jackpot!!!!! I love the song "All The Young Dudes". We're talking 1972 here.
So that's what I'm going to do this weekend. I'm going to sleep a lot. I'm going to read a lot and go to the gym a lot.
That's it.
Been exchanging emails with my baby and my favorite writer, Beau Burriola. Sweet baby. So good to hear from him.
Let's see, just been working. Been doing nothing actually.
You know me.
Today, I chatted with the genius who custom makes my cockrings. He's a sweet man. And his work is superb. He's a genius. He knows male genitalia.
He's made me two rings so far. They're both stainless steel and I can wear them all day. I don't even know they're on. We have this relationship, the Artist and I. He's turning me onto metal and I'm turning him onto rubber and silicone. Anyway, he's creating a ring for the two of us. It's going to weighted.
Mmmmmmmmm.
I can't wait.
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4.22.08
People always bring me or turn me onto things because they like to hear what I think. Books, CDs, etc. I love it. A Co-Worker gave me:
Mycle Wastman's "A Beautiful Stay" What a beautiful CD. Local guy. My Co-Worker begged me to go with her to the CD Release Party, but of course I was busy. I love this CD. What a beautiful mood. What a beautiful voice. His voice is a mixture between D'angleo and Babyface, but there is also this subtle lift...this easy, "I'm not even trying to impress you" to Mycle. It's awesome. And he's fine too. Next time I'm asked to go to a CD Release Party, I'm going. I'm going to make time. Great CD. Thanks Liza.
Home.
I got home, pulled off those Mid-Thigh Jockeys that were holding a Brother together all day. They hold, but Lord, when it's time for those boys to come off, they got to go. I peeled them off and shook the package free and put on my favorite XXL sweats and the phone rang. It was that wonderful woman who alters my leathers telling me the things I dropped off to her were ready for a final fitting and pick-up. I got my tired ass up and grabbed some clothes and walked down the hill. Her work is fabulous. As always. I'm set.
I don't go out any more. I'm either tired or the bars are tired to me these days. You know I'm not going to stand in line. And you know I need a chair to sit my ass down. I'm 45 years old. My heart is willing, but the body ain't able sometimes. Gay Bars bug me these days. I was talking to the woman who hooks my leathers up about this very same thing tonight. She and I are the same age and we both agreed that we did all that bar shit in the 80s and 90s. I don't want to say it, but it's true. How did I get to this space in my life? Where did the time and energy go?
But, I'll tell you this. One of these days I'll get a bee in my bonnet and I'll gear up and take my ass to the Leather Bars here in Seattle.
Nothing to do, but to get in the mood and get off the sofa.
Can't use the old "I ain't got nothing to wear" excuse.
The boots are dusty. The Chain Mail, the Leather T-Shirts, all the straps, snaps, hats, and cuffs and gloves and all that stuff is just sitting and waiting.
I'll surprise myself one day soon and go out on a Saturday night.
Hopefully.
If not, hey, it's all good.
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4.19.07
At home.
Doing laundry. How boring am I? I do my laundry every Saturday night. And I love it. Love doing laundry.
Got up early and went to The Nike Store. I lost my work out gloves somewhere. I hate that. So I had to go and buy more.
Got home later today and found one glove. Too late now, I've already bought another pair. GRRRRR
Went and got my hair cut. Did a little shopping and came home and took a nap.
Now, I'm cleaning, doing laundry, cooking and going to watch a movie. Lord, my bathroom was a mess. I had to get in that girl and clean her.
I'm going to pan fry some shrimp, red and green peppers and a little white wine. Then I'm going to add some onion and garlic and Angel Hair Pasta. Season it lightly and pour myself a glass of wine.
It's Spring Thaw Weekend here in Seattle. That means that all the Bears are out having a good time. Right on!
Funny, but it snowed a little today. It rained. It hailed and it sleeted too. Seattle. But, it's perfect weather for Bears.
That's cool.
I'm listening to:
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4.16.08
Busy day at the office. Working for a living and getting a paycheck is a fair exchange, but Lord knows it's work sometimes. Those folk work my nerves. I'm focusing on Australia. That will keep me going. I've been even toying with the idea of Berlin for Christmas and New Years. That would be a kick. Cold as fuck, but I'll just do the math and see if I can afford it and wear my heavy leathers.
I made reservations at my favorite hotel in Berlin, but of course it's booked. I'm on a waiting to list to see if some people will check out or cancel after the 28th of December. My plan is to be there for Christmas and just stay. We'll see how it goes.
Home from the gym. I don't know what they feed Brothers in The Carolinas, but there is this Brother who is new here and I always see him either at the gym or on our way to work. He's the sweetest, most polite, finest little thing that has ever come out of the South. Every time I see him, he's always dressed perfectly. At the gym we talk a bit and work out, but I love talking shit to him just to see that smile.
And when I talk shit to him he just blushes, smiles/laughs and shakes his head saying, "You are a mess. You know that?"
I know that.
And you, you just fine Country Boy.
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4.15.08
I'm listening to:
Love this CD. Love the cover. Why is that if a man plays the trumpet, there is always some woman hanging off him? Strangest thing.
Last night I went to bed and had the strangest dream.
I dreamt that my baby, David in San Francisco was running from the Nazis and he came to me. I was living with a partner who was away on business or something. David is Jewish. You know the Love Of My Life was Jewish. Don't even get me started on Sons of Abraham. Okay? So, I go to the door and David (a very, very handsome man) comes to my door in tattered clothing, long hair and beard. He was soooo thin.
Of course I took him in and hid him from the Nazis.
If found out, we both would die.
At one point in the dream, I went out to steal food and San Francisco was war torn and a lot of bombs had hit it. Mayhem and destruction abound.
The storefronts were boarded up and I went searching in alleys/dumpsters and behind restaurants, to look for food. Everyone was frightened and there was a curfew. I remember getting back to David and feeding him. We sat up and talked and were afraid together.
I woke up suddenly and was shaking and sweating like a mule. I wear a little leather Hangman's Noose around my neck daily. A sub at an IML years ago made it for me. When I woke suddenly, the leather was soaked. I was sweating that hard.
I got to work, had a conference call and texted David and told him all about the dream.
Dreams are a trip. And someone once said that dreams are all about you.
Hmmmmm
Figure that one out.
David (whom I love) and I talked and caught up today. Tax day. So good to talk to him. David is my Boo.
David also told me that another old friend had a commitment ceremony last week.
All the children I used to hang with in SF are married. All of them. Who am I going to go kick it with in San Fran? They're going to be all hooked up and there I'll be left on the side, cocktail in hand, in that same old Bridesmaids, Chiffon, Sky Blue Gown.
Looking hot (don't get me wrong), but single.
My friends know I love them all. I do.
Someday my Prince will come. Oh, yes. And he'll say, "Where the Hell you been?"
Until then, I'll keep on dreaming.
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4.13.08
I sat around yesterday and read. Silly me, it was 73 degrees out. I didn't feel like it. I did get out and go to the store for beer. People were in shorts and guys even had their shirts off. In Seattle, 73 degrees is reason so celebrate.
I sat around more and got up and cooked dinner.
I spent a lot of time chatting with my buddy in Sydney. He's excited about my trip there and I'm excited too. I called Verizon to talk about my Blackberry and if I'll be able to use it while there. Yes, I can use it, but it's going to cost me $2.49 a minute. Uh...we'll be keeping those calls short.
I think checking out Leather Sydney with a Aussie Leather sub is going to be fun.
I also called my friend Floyd and talked to him for a long time. Love Floyd.
Before bed, I got around to watching one of the four DVDs that recently came to me for possible review. Last night I watched:
I loved it. It was interesting. Jock Itch is all about Sports Gear. It's Jake Deckard's
second Directorial after Ink Storm. I like Jake a lot. He's smart. He's fine as fuck and he's a nice guy. Great job on Jock Itch, Jake. I love the cover even. I had the chance to interview Jake and you can find that below in the "Chat With The Stars" section of Nappy.
The DVD is about jocks getting it on. And do they ever.
Logan McCree. Logan MCree.
Good Lord. Talk about a wonderful performer. He's soooooooo hot!!! And y'all should see him in person. He was Mr. German Leather 2004 and he took my breath away that year at IML. He's gorgeous. Love the beard. Love the ink. His body is amazing and the boy gives you b-b-b-booty for days. (shuddering just thinking about it) Make sure you go to the extras and watch the interview between Logan and Jake. Fascinating stuff. (shuddering still) WOOF!! WOOF!!!
Another person to watch in Jock Itch is:
RJ Danvers. This sweet looking boy can take a pounding. No joke. And RJ does it with that look. You know the look. That look that says, "More. Give me some more Daddy. I can take it." The scene with RJ up against a shower wall is not to be missed.
Jock Itch will have you itching alright. Itching to grab your lube.
Y'all ain't hearing me.
It's late afternoon. Time to clean the kitchen from last night and start dinner. Work tomorrow. I found out Friday that I have to go back to Vegas soon for a couple of days. When I was there last month, I forgot to check out restaurants for the upcoming meeting. Not a bad trip. I'll ride around in Towncars and just order food at different restaurants around the city. Hey, people got to eat and they're depending on me to tell them where to go.
Got up early this morning and went to the gym. Got that out of the way. I feel good.
Shower time. I smell like a goat.
Also, I'm soooo not in the mood for sex these days. Actually, it's been since Christmas Eve 2007. I think about it, but when it comes to the actual thing, I'm not in the mood. I know there's nothing physically wrong with me. The problem for me is trust in another partner. There are too many irresponsible guys out there. And I don't want the headache. There is also the trying to find a partner into the same things you're into and who's not boring. Once I'm bored it's all over. And there is also that you're into them, but they're not into you. They're into you but, you're not into them. The sex is great, but the guy is an ass. The sex is rotten, but the guy is great. The guy has a boyfriend and is just fucking around. You want to see more of him, but he wants just sex. He wants to see more of you, but you want just sex. It goes on and on.
All I know is I'm not in the mood. It'll pass. I go through these phases all the time. Trust me, it ain't no biggie.
By the way, I'm listening to:
The Very Best Of The Spinners. Old School. Love them. "I Never Knew Love Before (Then Came You)" with Miss Dionne Warwick is my song.
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4.9.08
I'm listening to:
Great CD. I love KD. I think she is soooo talented, I think she's pretty too and she has such a beautiful voice. And Tony is just DA MAN. It's a wonderful CD. All of it. It's perfection. There aren't many "perfections" around these days.
Home from work.
Today is a gym day for me. Can't make it. I'll have to make it up on the weekend. Hell, I ain't doing nothing else. Might as well work out.
I didn't go to the gym. I had to clean. The Bachelor Pad is a mess. And I can make a mess, y'all. My First Husband; Brian, said that "Picking up after me was the hardest job he ever had to do."
I'm sorry Brian.
I'm a slob.
Anyways, I'm cleaning and going to have leftover baked chicken, rice and veggies.
Caught a slight cold. It's ok. Just a lot of sneezing and coughing. I think the worst of it is over. It only lasted 24 hours.
I'm going to take some over the counter shit, iron clothes for work tomorrow, eat and go to bed.
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4.6.08
Got up this morning and did some shopping. A darling sex boutique here was having a sale on cockrings, so I picked up a big, ol' heavy cockring for my buddy and cockring Yoda, Kevin.
Kevin is da man!!!! Above is one of my favorite photos of Kevin.
We both love cock and ball toys. He's the one that got me started, so whenever I see a ring or a ball toy, I pick it up for him. He gave me 2 black rings that he wore all the time. I love them. I went over and dropped the ring off and it fits him perfectly. Enjoy buddy. Love you.
Went to the gym and had a great workout. I wore my favorite ring. It's a red, silicone tear drop. It lifts and pushes out. I wore it under a yellow jock strap and underneath my shorts. Needless to say, when I was done with my work out and headed to the locker room, I got lots of stares.
Went to Barnes and Noble to get a clip on reading lamp to put on the novel I'm reading. Nothing better than sitting on the sofa and escaping in a good book.
Cooking dinner now. The work clothes are ironed for tomorrow. I'm showered and moisturized.
Guess I'm ready for the week.
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4.5.08
Wow, it's been quite a week!
Went to see
at the 5th Ave Theater downtown. It was awesome. It's still in my head. The Master of Ceremonies was played by Nick Garrison. He's sooooooooooooooooooooo hot to me. He also starred in Seattle's version Hedwig and The Angry Inch. He sent me in that. My seat was right up front at Cabaret. Nick had me from his first musical note. Cabaret is my favorite and I loved it. Did I say that Nick Garrison was amazing?
Worked this week. It was cool. Nothing exciting there.
Last night me and my str8 buddy had dinner and went out and kicked it. Actually, the night turned into us having some deep conversations about sex, relationships and other stuff. He's a great guy. I'm so honored to be his buddy. We drank WAY too much beer, but we had a good time. We always do.
I met with a Personal Trainer this week. It was funny. He put me through some routines and I kicked butt. He was all up in my grill and that was fine. He was impressed with my form and skill. I don't know what people think I do at the gym. I don't mess around. The Trainer thought he was going to get me to sign up with him for $400 for 6 sessions. Uh..., loved working out with him, but I did the Trainer thing last year. I think I got it. But, honestly I do have to say that I enjoy working with a Trainer.
At home. Doing laundry. Gonna make a flank steak and toss it with a fresh green salad. A little wine and catch myself up on The Tudors Season Two. I love cable.
Tomorrow I have to head to the gym. I also got 3 Porn DVDs in the mail this week. Got to watch them so I can tell you about them.
Ugly job, but someone has to do it.
Was running errands today and ran into 3 men that I've slept with. I had forgotten all about one man. He's deaf and Latino. I had forgotten all about him. But, apparently, it wasn't the same for him. I was so embarrassed. He and I were signing and he was so happy to see me. Child, I can't even tell you his name.
What a slut.
(giggling)
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3.30.08
Winding down.
Nothing to report today.
I got up and realized that I had a lot of crap to do, so I did my stuff.
Sent texts to people who wanted to see me or hang out. I wasn't in the mood.
Especially not in the mood for mind games and head trips.
Work tomorrow.
SIGH
I'll be fine. I just got to pray for a good nights sleep.
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3.29.08
Sitting at home doing laundry and I'm making a homemade turkey noodle soup. I made it with brussel sprouts, tons of onion, garlic, fresh carrots, mushrooms and egg noodles. Oh, and one jalapeño. It's going to rock! You know, I'm going to fry a little corn bread with that too. It's going to lay me out. But, comfort food does that.
I'm listening to:
There are some things that I love about this CD and there are some things that I have problems with. But, it's perfect for this evening.
Got up and my gym was having a free class today on lower body. Kicked my ass. I swear. I consider myself in good shape, but I was sweating like a goat up in there. The Trainer who was running the class was all up in my grill. He's always cruising me. I don't pay him no attention. Guess what? He used me to demonstrate every routine. When the class was over and I went to the Locker Room to change, there he was. He told to me to sign up for a free work out with him. I did. I love learning new things. But, he's got to keep his hands to himself. Geesh!
I take my ass back to work on Monday. I guess I'm ready. I'm going to be busy until the end of June. I got a BIG meeting to throw in Vegas. After that, I can relax a bit. Then, I'm off to Sydney.
Other than that, I'm cool
It hit me today, I'm happy.
I love my life. It's cool. I have a great job. I have a great network of friends. I'm going to see my favorite musical "Cabaret" next week. I'm healthy. I have some shit and regrets like all folk do, but my shit is manageable. At least it has been so far.
Got "dinner" tomorrow with this guy I used to date. He says a lot, but his follow through leaves a lot to be desired. I'll have dinner with him, if he shows up or calls. I'm so over him and his bullshit. I know what I'll do (it's what I always do when I have to deal with him), I'll go on with my day. If he calls, I'll go to dinner. If I don't hear from him, I'm cool too. I'm going to go on as if he won't call or show. I know that there won't be NO FUCKING. That ended long time ago. He's a nice guy, but he has so much shit (shit that he thinks is important) in his life. If he really looked at it, he'd open his eyes and see that he needs to be real about so many things.
I'm going to change the bed, shower, eat and chill.
Nothing like a clean bed and a clean body.
That's my Saturday night.
Hope yours is more exciting than mine.
______________________________________
I got busy with work.
I got busy with this crazy life of mine.
So, I stopped writing here, and I missed it.
I missed writing.
So, I decided to rethink this site and just see what I come up with.
Thanks you all for supporting me.
Thanks to my ex, Paul (that sweet boy). Thanks to Kevin and thank you Michael Brandon for sending me your video (that first video) so long ago. I still own it. Hell, I love you and it's signed by you. Love you, Michael. Mean it.
Ok, here we go:
I've been a busy man.
I've been off work all week. I work hard and it's a pretty stressful job. I enjoy it though.
Hell, I have to. It's my livelihood and a bit more.
I've been listening to:
Anthony Hamilton
"Comin' From Where I'm From"
Love this CD.
I'm just Soul. Sorry. I can't be anything else.
Anthony gives you Soul.
I love his voice. I love his mood. It's Old School but, it's not. Soul is all about the feeling and the delivery. And to sing Soul, you got to be honest.
I put this CD on and just let it play. It's cool like that. Don't even ask me what's my favorite song. I love them all.
I bought the CD and immediately put it on my ipod.
I listen to it when I'm at the gym. I listen to it when I'm cleaning. I listen to it when I'm shopping. I listen to it when I'm just walking around Seattle. I listen to it often.
I love when a Brother sings about about missing something/someone. I love when a Brother sings about how he feels when he's next to the person he loves. I love when a Brother breaks it down and talks about what God means to him or what his Mother did for him. I love this CD because Anthony knows what he's talking about.
Beautiful voice.
Beautiful CD.
I read a great article the other day in Details Magazine. It's the one with Ryan Seacrest on the cover. Great article about Bromances and having a Man Crush on another man. It's all about the relationships men have with one another. In these Bromances, these men go out to dinner. They buy each presents. They dig each other's company but, it's not a Gay Thing.
It's fascinating. I have a Man Crush on a guy. He's a great guy. He's Straight. He's cool. He makes me laugh and we have a great time together. We were inseparable for a bit. I had like 700 texts from him in one month. I enjoyed every one. It's not even about sex. I couldn't imagine. He's just a tall, sexy, funny, wonderful, brilliant man who I have a crush on. We have a thang going on. Read the article.
Right now I'm listening to:
Mr. Isaac Hayes. That's Old School. Ike and me go way, way back.
Let's see I had my teeth cleaned today. Love that. My Dentist is sooooooooo hot. He's this lean, tall, fine Chinese Daddy. He has the most beautiful hair and teeth ever. He'll put on that rubber glove and start running his fingers on the inside of my mouth and I just melt. I've always loved going to the dentist, but I really love it these days. Of course my check up was perfect.
Called Raging Stallion Studios and talked to two of my old buddies there today. I love them both. I love that studio. They've been good to me all these years.
I congratulated them on sweeping the awards this year with:
They won it all. And they deserve it. Raging Stallion Studios are family to me. Check the above DVD out. Give yourself a weekend though. No shit. It's a 6 Disc thang. Worth every frame.
Anyway, I got to dishing with the children and told them that I needed photos of:
Ricky Sinz.
Ricky is fascinating. When I first saw him I didn't know what to think. Then I started paying attention to Ricky. Then I got it. Check him out in Grunts and watch his solo scene. It's amazing. So amazing that he won Best Solo Performance this year. But, I knew he would.
Ricky reminds me of the Straight man I used to see. We didn't have no Bromance. Oh, no. We were sho nuff fucking. He and Ricky share that same "no labels" kinda sexuality that I think is sexy.
Ok, I told Raging Stallion to send me another photo set. I had to see more of, my husband:
Antonio Biaggi.
It's been said that Antonio has the "Biggest Cock In Porn". But, it's not about just that. Nope, not for me. Ok....ok, a big cock looks good on ones resume, don't get me wrong, but I think Antonio is hot. Could be that he and I together would be nothing but a Peanut Butter Cup? Could be something about that look? Hard to tell. There's something about him that does it for me.
Anyway, I'm chilling at home. Dinner is cooking in the oven and I'm good.
Just yesterday I had my HIV/STD test and everything is cool. Testing is so important.
Testing let's you know what's going on. Gots to be up on my shit.
I'm also researching Sydney, Australia. That will be my next vacation.
Looking forward to it. Where can I find a canteen and some field glasses?
Hmmmm.
I'm not going to wear nothing but Khaki. Think tans and browns. I know I'll look like a idiot, but hey, it's my party.
Down Under is my next destination, but until then, I got to work and make some mo' money.
International travel ain't cheap y'all.
Wear a condom. Be yourself. Be Nappy.
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